What binds a Christian to a particular denomination or congregation?
In my mind, the relationship between me and a Christian group is a lot like a Venn diagram. One circle is me, another circle is the beliefs/practices of the local church. But there are other circles in the picture–relationships I have with people I love who also attend that local church. My affinity for the local church may be weak but my affinity for those I love is very strong.
The amount of overlap between my circle and the local church consists of many elements including doctrine, world view (I hate that term, but it’s such a good shorthand), worship style and focus, the quality of teaching, and areas where my talents are needed/used. In other words, to what degree the local church and I can edify one another.
When I was a child, I had a very strong affinity to my denomination and local church. I uncritically believed everything they taught, participated in most of their programs and attended with family members I loved very much. The two Venn circles overlapped almost completely.
As I experienced life and worked to reconcile my experiences to the Bible and the teachings of my denomination and local church, the overlap decreased. I began to interpret the Bible differently, engage in “ministry” that they did not support and moved away from family members in that church. It finally got to the point that the bonds were so weak, I decided to look for another church “home”. I moved away from them.
When I began the search and finally decided on a new church in a different denomination, I began to realize the “Venn-ishness” of the relationship between the denomination/local church. No relationship would ever be a complete overlap of circles and that was a good thing because it challenged my belief system constantly.
But time and experience move on and I continue to change in my thinking. Ties to my second church home weakened and ones I loved were also seeking a new church home. So we found a local “non-denominational” church we could all live with. It didn’t take me long to realize that my affinity to my loved ones was substantially greater than to the local church itself. Still, I reasoned that since I would never find a “perfect” church, this one was as good as any. The Venn diagram looks more like the Olympic rings with the local church at one end and me on the other.
Then came the Manhattan Declaration. It has forced me to include a new dimension to my Venn model–attractive and repelling forces. The overlap of the circles represents attractive forces–common agreement and practice. But the non-common areas of each circle can either be neutral or repelling. There are a lot of things we can agree to disagree on and get on with life, but there are some areas of disagreement that are so compelling to both parties that the two circles begin to push each other away.
Since the Manhattan Declaration was essentially set forth as church doctrine, I am so repelled that the circles have almost parted completely, even though most of the original overlap still exists. It is only the ties of love that keep me there. My assessment is that the local church has chosen to move away from me. It is as if their circle became pear shaped with the dissonant area increasing.
This is what I am struggling with today.
